Rev. Fr. David Okolie
Dearest friends, one of the serious problems of our age is SEXUAL ADDICTIONย which has ruined the lives of many promising young men and women and has equally destroyed many marriages.
Sexual Addictionย is the STRONG attachment/bond that exists between a person and his/her source(s) of Sexual gratification/satisfaction. For example, one who tries to gratify his/her sexual desires with pornographic materials, would eventually be attached/addicted to pornography such that he/she cannot stay without viewing pornographic materials. The same goes with other sexual vices: masturbation, fornication, adultery, homosexuality (gay/lesbianism), etc.
๐๐ผNow, for those who do not yet know, this is how ADDICTION develops: whenever a person is gratifying his/her sexual desires, there is a hormone called *OXYTOCIN* which is secreted in the brain. The function of this hormone, among others, is to *STRONGLY BOND* the person and the source of his/her sexual gratification. This bonding is too STRONG such that it is not easily broken (cf. โPorn Myth’ by Matt Fradd, p. 24). Indeed, freedom from addiction really requires DIVINE INTERVENTION.
๐๐ผThe only way to avoid ADDICTION is to say NO to PREMARITAL and EXTRAMARITAL sexual gratifications. Thus, the unmarried are encouraged to practice VIRGINAL/CELIBATE CHASTITY (i.e Abstinence) and the married are encouraged to practice CONJUGAL CHASTITY (i.e Sticking only to your wife/husband). Try always to engage yourself POSITIVELY โBy refusing to be IDLE, but either reading or writing, or praying or meditating, or labouring in something that may be for the common good”ย (cf. โMy Imitation of Christ’ Bk. 1, Ch. 19).
Dearest friends, the above may be difficult but it is not IMPOSSIBLE. It is unfortunate that some โSelf- proclaimed teachers’ on the social media are encouraging people to explore all kinds of sexual gratification. Those who listen to such charlatans eventually become victims of addiction and they live to cry and regret it.
Indeed, you and I, dearest friends, should always keep before our eyes these powerful lines from the Catechism thus: โCHASTITY includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery which is a training in human FREEDOM. The alternative is clear: either man GOVERNS his passions and finds PEACE, or he lets himself be DOMINATED by them and becomes UNHAPPY” (cf. CCC n. 2339). The โUNHAPPY‘ in the above quote include, but not limited to, all the necessary allies of Addiction; namely: Bankruptcy, unplanned pregnancy, marriage crisis, unplanned polygamy, HIV/AIDS and other Sexually Transmitted Diseases, etc.
๐๐ผFor those who are already suffering from addiction, all hope is not yet lost. You can emulate the example of ST. AUGUSTINE, who, when he was struggling with Sexual sins, cried to God repeatedly and God helped him to BREAK off from the sinful chains when he heard the voice that told him: โTolle Lege‘ (i.e Take up and read) and when he read Romans 13:13-14, his eyes were opened and he regained his FREEDOM. Also, as often as you still struggle with the Addiction, always REPENT sincerely and go for CONFESSION; the GRACES obtained at the Confessional will also help. Do not fail to say your ROSARY always; seeking for the intercession of the Blessed Mary, Mother Most Pure. You can also seek the assistance of psychotherapists.
St. Augustine, pray for us๐๐ผ
Remain blessed๐๐ผ
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